It’s that time of the week friends! Throwback Thursday is upon us once again, and today I’m taking you on a journey to one of the BEST shows of our time. Before Vanderpump ruled, or housewives were “real”, Bravo aired a little show called “Showbiz Moms and Dads”. Also known as, a wonderfully drama filled saga that I desperately wished to be a cast member of! Sigh. If only I could have convinced my parents to head west and throw their lives away so that I could perform ear piercing Garth Brook’s karaoke at steak houses, my life might have turned out different. But alas, the latter did not happen.
The basic premise of this work of television art was just what the title implied. A show centered on the ups and downs of mothers and fathers who aggressively pushed their children into the spotlight at all costs. Amazing, right? If you’re not convinced, let’s take a look at the cast as I’m sure this will instantly win you over!
|An acne free Jordan!|
First up, we have the Baron family. Jordan Baron was a 14 year old actress trying to make it big. Along with Jordan, we have her somewhat psychotic mother and little sister Samantha. Jordan came from a broken family, suffered from some seriously reptile skin like acne, was semi- atrocious in her acting, and overall appeared unpleasant to be around in general. Jordan was always in route to her next audition (Translation – Eating McDonalds in the back of a late model Honda Accord while hurling obscenities at her mother) with her stage mom by her side. Her mother (her name wasn’t memorable) wanted the best for her, but Jordan never saw that, as evidenced by the multitude of instances where she accused her of living vicariously through her. In addition to having a highly volatile relationship and bombing all of her auditions, things came to a head for these two at the end of the season when a casting director informed Jordan’s stage mom/agent that she sucked! Okay, she didn’t come out and say it like that, but she did rip her to shreds on the acne and lazy approach to a personal style. Needless to say, Jordan was pissed and told the cameras what she really thought of the casting director. There were a few bleeps involved! Meanwhile back in the Honda, her Mom decided to head back in and try to get a gig for Samantha. If you can’t beat em’ join em’ right? A few days later, it was revealed that Jordan’s mom was engaged to her boyfriend of 5 minutes and that the family was moving to Colorado. I believe his name was Dave, but I’m not entirely convinced of that. This led to an outraged Jordan throwing a broom, crying, calling her Grandpa to set up a new living situation, refusing to move to Colorado, calling her mom a biznatch, crying, and ultimately living with a family friend when mommy dearest, Dave (maybe?), and Samantha headed off to a new life full of snow skiing, hot chocolate, and family memories. Until the camera crew returned 2 weeks later to find that things with Dave didn’t work out and Mom and Samantha were heading back to L.A. to reunite with Medusa!
Next, we have the Nutters! The Nutters were a strange breed of people. The kids hated acting, their Dad, Duncan, was way too into it, and their Mom just really didn’t care what was going on. She was also a tad bit homely and allowed her husband to uproot their
|Are the Nutters a fake family? I think so!|
small town lives and drag their family of seven to NYC in search of fame and fortune. It didn’t really work out for them! The Nutter’s story was more about their father than anything else. He wanted to be an actor more than anything! I was convinced back in 2004, that Duncan had hired these people to play his family just so he could get on the show. Of that, I am still convinced! Things culminated for the Nutters, when a show that Duncan had been working on for the family was shot down. They were then asked on Oprah for a special about crazy stage parents where things didn’t go so well for Duncan. The kids were excited about the hotel stay and limo though. They even tried to take the big hotel room but Duncan kicked them out. I mean, why would SEVEN children/teenagers need the bigger hotel room? Clearly, the TWO married adults needed the room with TWO extra large beds, a TV, and one of those little refrigerators that you open with a key! (If you don’t understand that reference, we are certainly not friends!) This further proved my point that Duncan’s “family” was all an act. Clearly, this was never proven. I’m sure the Nutters are living happily ever after in their studio apartment to this day. You don't want to miss this Duncan Nutter tribute courtesy of YouTube!
|The Tye's, paving the way for Mama June and Honey Boo Boo!|
The third family in the group, I could have honestly cared less about. They were crazy! They weren’t even into acting. It was all about pageants! GAG ME! I mean, if I wanted to watch the heartwarming tale of pageantry life I’d watch “Miss Congeniality”. Anyway, blah, blah, blah, Emily Tye was a four year old pageant star. Her Mom pushed her into pageants all up and down the coast of Florida. Her brother was forced to escort and practice with her also. He wasn’t too into this, but he was a good sport. There was also the Grandma element with this family. She was always at the pageants and all up in the pageant mama drama. To make a long story short, Emily won a few titles, but the other moms were PISSED that the cameras were filming their pageant world. They thought Emily was getting special treatment! So, the bashed her and her Mom and tried to get Emily’s titled taken away. Gasp! This upset Emily’s mom to no end. Not only did this infuriate the woman with the tight curls in her hair, but somewhere along the line she decided it would be a wonderful idea to start reading message boards. Yeah, not so wonderful! She was pretty torn up by this, but Emily was unaffected. There was even a scene in which the Grandma came over to read the message boards with the Mom. It was like a hater party! I personally want to thank the Tye family for breaking the John Bennett Ramsey stereotype and paving the way for American Icons like Honey Boo Boo! Thanks Tye Family!
The only family to see some form of success was the Moseley-Stephens family. Made up of 8 year old Jordan and her mom, this family was very driven. This Jordan was sweet and adorable, unlike the previous Jordan we discussed. Her mom worked in the industry, and actually repped Bow Wow, who was still “lil” at the time. In on episode Jordan tags along with her mom and hangs out on the set of “One on One”. Things were always quite peachy for the Moseley-Stephens family, except that one time when Jordan didn’t do her homework. Ohhhhhh snap! Hide yo kids and hide yo wife ya’ll! The highlight of Jordan’s time on the show, was a gig on the Disney Channel hit “That’s So Raven” starring Raven Symone (It’s the future I can see, it’s so mysterious to meeeeeeeeeee!). This involved a viewing party episode with Jordan and all of her friends. This, for an 8 year old girl in 2004 was probably a pretty big deal! You can check the TSR clips out here! Jordan was also working on a more serious role as a child abuse victim with some pretty big stars. They obviously weren’t too big, because I’ve forgotten who they were. I do believe Monique was involved though! Jordan went on to hold small guest roles on shows like “What I Like About You” and “ER”.
|Debbie and Shane in a bar! #TeamShane|
Finally, we have reached someone who I consider to be the star of the show, Shane Klingensmith! Shane was what Google calls the “puppet child” of his loving and overly annoying mother Debbie. Debbie was convinced that Shane was the next Aaron Carter. It was a whole big to do! She scored him many a gig performing what can only be described as horrendous versions of popular country songs on truck beds filled with hay at county fairs everywhere. Shane’s Dad was a truck driver, so Debbie had a lot of free time. Things got real, when Debbie’s dad scored Shane a gig at a popular tourist attraction, Gilly’s. Shane’s name was finally in lights, and the duo couldn’t hold back their tears. The ultimate moment for these two, came when Debbie rented some space at the local YMCA to practice her choreography with Shane and his band of 12 year old back up dancer s before the big performance. Somehow, a manager decided they couldn’t use the space with only 10 minutes left in their rehearsal. Debbie was irate! She yelled, she screamed, and I’m pretty sure that she threatened to write a letter. I’m not positive though, that might have just been something that happened in “White Chicks” and that I like to reference when people get upset. Shrug. In the end of the series, Shane was still working on his dream of a singing career, and Debbie was taking some time to focus on her bustling career as a time share sales woman. Don't miss this Debbie tribute video courtesy of YouTube!
Aren’t these people fantastic? This show was the highlight of my life from April to May of 2004. I never missed an episode! I fully believe that my life would not be as rich had I not had the pleasure of soaking in every moment of this masterpiece.
Where Are They Now?
Jordan B. – Jordan recently played a stage hand in a 2012 episode of “Glee”. Clearly, her Mom’s decision to stay in L.A. was a life changer! This girl’s acting career is on FIRE!!! You can view her IMDB link here!
The Nutter Family – The kids didn’t/haven’t gone on to do anything worthy of being Googled, but Duncan did go on to appear in “Battle of The Network Reality Stars”. And that was it. His career didn’t take off either!
Emily Tye – Emily went on to continue in pageants, as evidenced by this random YouTube video. Other than a few random obituaries (they don’t belong to her!) Google results for Emily produce no noteworthy results. There was a questionable twitter account that was semi-graphic but it was proved to not belong to this Emily Tye. Although, it would have made this article ten times better!
Jordan M. – Jordan hasn’t done any noteworthy acting since 2005.
Shane K – Shane went on to become a platinum recording artist that you may know by the name of Justin Bieber! Okay, I’m totally kidding. He went on to perform at more random venues and become the owner of this Weebly page where it appears he is some kind of vocal instructor. God help those students!